CNN: Alright, so I guess you guys probably don’t mind the extra heat in the summer, thankfully Canada is a cold country! So let me get this straight, when you say that you don’t have to meet specific body images, adhere to new fashion or makeup trends, does that mean you don’t take care of yourselves? I mean, underneath all that clothing, does it feel great to be unattractive?
SM: See this is where people get confused. There are certain people we can actually look attractive for, and others for whom we can’t. The Arabic word ‘Mahram’ is what defines this. The term ‘Mahram’ refers to the group of people who are unlawful for a woman to marry, due to marital or blood relationships. These people include her father, her sons, her brothers, maternal/paternal uncles, and her immediate nephews[1]. Others included are when she marries, including her husband obviously, as well as her father in law[2]. All this being said, besides the men mentioned above, it is unlawful for a woman to expose her beauty to other than them. Besides all this, it is actually obligatory for a woman to keep herself fit and looking good, especially as a wife. Basically, from your take of things, we are definitely not allowed to be unattractive slobs!
CNN: Now that you have subtly mentioned marriage, I’ll move onto my next question. Is it true that you all get forced to get married to older, dominating men? Like, do you seriously have no say in your marriage? Trust me, I’ve heard horror stories!!
SM: This is absolutely false. As Muslim women we have more than just a say in our marriages, we are allowed to choose whom we want to marry. To establish my point, a saying of the Prophet (pbuh[3]) goes as follows:
“A previously-married woman should not be married without consulting her and a virgin should not be married without asking her permission…”[4]
This saying displays as to how it is a woman’s own inherent choice to accept whom she wills to be her future husband, without any compulsion from others. As for the ‘horror stories’, it always makes me chuckle when people relate it to Islam. The sad stories we hear of in the Muslim world today are due to the lack of faith in Islam and acceptance of culture as opposed to religion. These cultures are those that branch out from other religious traditions, and for the most part utterly and completely oppose Islamic teachings. Lastly, as far as the ‘old and dominating’ men go, unless a girl really likes that in a man, I don’t think she’d necessarily vouch for that!
CNN: Alright, so you’re allowed to choose who you want to marry, but you become enslaved housewives after you’re married right?
SM: Muslim women are not enslaved by their so called ‘dominating husbands’. Believe it or not, many Muslim women actually choose to be housewives after marriage. Truthfully, its all about priorities. Thus many Muslim woman prioritize their families, working hard day and night to instill good morals and values within their children, as well as keeping a pleasant atmosphere within the household.
